Every kingdom in history has literally had to fight to keep its territory. Including the United States and other super powers. God also had to defend His kingdom from the devil. Scripture expresses this in the book of Revelation.

 And war broke out in heaven: Michael and his angels fought with the dragon; and the dragon and his angels fought, Revelation 12:7

Couples difference between Stagnation and Progress in your home oftentimes is Unity. Fight for your marriage. You see every successful marriage is a product of two people who decided to fight for their marriage. Regardless of who you marry, you are going to have to fight to keep that marriage. From the scripture above, we understand that God had to fight to keep His kingdom (more of a beat down). You also must fight for your marriage. Below are things to consider as you fight for your marriage.


  1. Identify the enemy: The difference between God fighting for His kingdom and couples fighting for their marriage lies in the identification of the opponent. Just as God could identify the enemy, couples need to be able to identify the enemy. Couples, in most cases the enemy is not your spouse. If the enemy was just your spouse, then the only area you should fight for will be your marriage. Every other area of your life will be perfect. The reality is that the same enemy God fought and overcame is the same enemy you must fight against in your marriage. Scripture expresses that the devil comes to kill, steal and destroy in the biblical account of John chapter 10 verse 10. This includes killing the dreams of couples, stealing the joy in marriages and destroying the marriage institution. Identifying the enemy is the first step in fighting for your marriage. Scripture expresses it this way in the book of Mark

 And if a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand – Mark 3:25

           Couples, I know that it sometimes feels that your spouse is the enemy. While other times it feels that your spouse is against you. I will like to submit to you today that your spouse is not the enemy. Although sometimes your spouse may be used by the enemy to attack your home, your spouse is not the enemy.

  1. Understand the battle field: You see one of the strategy of the Vietnamese during the war between America and Vietnam was gorilla war. Vietnam understood that they didn’t stand a chance with America toe to toe and as such resulted in a different battle strategy. They knew they stood a better chance if they engage in a battle where America had a hard time identifying them. You see if the devil shows up in your marriage with a pitch fork, he knows that he doesn’t stand a chance. However, if he shows up covered in pride, anger, selfishness, strife, lust, adultery  etc. he knows that he stands a better chance. Couples the mind is the battle field of your life and marriage. The fact is that battles and won and lost in the mind. Friends scripture clearly expresses it this way:

           For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, and being ready to punish all disobedience when your obedience is fulfilled – 2 Corinthians 10: 4-6

  1. Fight for your marriage: Couples cannot afford to be passive in the battles of life particularly in marriage. There is no demilitarized zone. That is why divorce shows its ugly head both in Christian and non-Christian circles. We must know how to engage the weapons at our disposal to ensure we enforce our victory as believers. Couples you see when it comes to fighting there are a few weapons at our disposal in Ephesians 6: 10-17  Notice that the weapons in the scripture above (Ephesian 6:10-17) covers everywhere except your back because the expectation is that you don’t run from this fight. You cannot run from fighting for your marriage. Someone says, what if I am willing to fight for my marriage but my spouse is not, what do I do? My answer to this question is to keep fighting. You must keep fighting for your marriage sometimes with or without your spouse fighting for your marriage.

The day you lose your desire to fight for your marriage is the day divorce starts knocking on your door.

Always remember that Marriage is a Journey not a destination. It should get better over time if the governing principles are consistently applied.

Love Always



  1. You words speak precisely what I went through to discover how cheap victory is with Gods’ word as my back up. I got to understand why I needed to put on the whole armour of God especially my. Faith. Thank you Mr Toyosi and to your lovely wife. Thank you. God bless every inspiration He has given you. In Jesus name. Amen….

    1. Thank you so much Ngozi. My prayer is that our generation will put on the whole armor of God and walk in total victory.
      Please continue to check our website for recourse for Godly marriages.
      God bless……Toyosi

    1. Glad you were blessed! Please continue to check our website for resources on how to grow your marriage.



  2. My marriage is going through a turbulence right now and I don’t think either of us want to fight for it,right now we are just co-existing and I am honestly at a loss at what to do, I don’t even feel like praying for the marriage anymore. I would appreciate some advice.

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