He is the solid foundation
“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash Mat 7:24-27
Notice that the passage of scripture did not talk about building on experience or emotions, rather on putting His Words into practice. Also notice that both foundations faced the same obstacle, however while the foundation built on sand (emotions, feelings, lust) could not withstand the obstacle, the foundation built on the rock (God’s Word, commitment to living for God) did. There is no trial or obstacle you face that is new or peculiar to you. What makes the difference is how you view the obstacle. Where some see an opportunity to learn and grow together by overcoming a challenge, others see an obstacle that is too big to overcome and therefore give up. The fact is that the Word of God has been tested time and time again and holds true. It is these Words that will be your anchor during trials in relationship, marriage and in life. The kind of relationship you intend on building will determine how much you put into the foundation. Marital foundations are established at the beginning, reinforced in courtship, tested in marriage and validated by fulfilling the plan and purpose of God
You don’t have enough information by yourself to make decisions about the future today.
Until you can see the future literally, you need God’s intervention in making decisions that has to do with the future. One thing we know for sure as human beings is that the world as we know it is constantly changing and as such, how does one make future decisions with todays limited information that is subject to change and be confident of the outcome? Particularly, how does one chose a spouse based on the limited information you have that is subject to change. The fact is that people evolve and change as life unfolds what it has to offer. It may be a little easier if the outcome is solely based on your decision, however in the case of selecting a spouse it is not. For example, back ground check does not tell that you have an attitude problem or that you stir up conflict. Neither does your resume tell me that you will show up to work late 85% of the time. My point is that you just don’t have enough information by yourself to make future decisions and expect to be accurate 100% of the time particularly when selecting a spouse
David, despite the strength of his army understood this foundational principle as he enquired of the Lord before he made a move.
1 Samuel 30:8 (Ziklag) “And David enquired at the LORD, saying, Shall I pursue after this troop? Shall I overtake them? And he answered him, Pursue: for thou shalt surely overtake them, and without fail.
Spend adequate time seeking to inquire from God before you select your spouse. This is a principle God has put in place.
To insulate your marriage from the limitations of the world
What so ever is born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that overcomes the world even our faith. 1 John 5:4
For a relationship to reach and release its full potential in marriage, God has to be the foundation. Releasing your potential has to do with being fruitful. I am not referring to having children; I am talking about fulfilling what God has sent you to do. Marriage in itself is not the end goal, but a tool to serve God’s plan for your life. Too many people get married and get stuck. They get married and can’t find a sense of purpose and drive anymore because it is now about my children and my spouse. It is about meeting the responsibilities I have with my new family so that we can stay together forever. This is the lie the devil and the world systems sells to once you get married and you reduce your purpose in life to just meeting your marital needs. Not saying you should neglect your family. My point is that you need God’s involvement in your marriage to able to live purposeful lives which goes way beyond just living together. If the foundation upon which a relationship stands is not born of God, it will not overcome the world, no matter how good it may seem.
Who God has prepared for you to marry, He will empower you to understand and relate with
No one knows about a product more than the creator of the product and as such when it comes to making future decision with regards to a product, you need to get enough insight about that product. This can be achieved by either consulting with the creator of that product, going through the owner’s manual or by trial and error. God is the most purposeful being and His will for you is not just to get married and have children, but to expand His Kingdom on earth. With that comes the grace and empowerment you need to fulfill His assignment. Marriage is no different; God knows the kind of person that has the capacity to bring out His best in you. He knows that His goal for marriage is not just get married and have children, but to expand His Kingdom by replicating heaven on earth. He will help look beyond some character flaws, help you understand that He is still working in your spouse.
God has made all grace abound towards you. Understand that the grace supplied is to enable you apply the marriage principles from God’s Word.
But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me was not in vain; but I labored more abundantly than they all, yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me (1 Corinthians 15:10)
Without the grace of God on your marriage, you will toil. Too many marriages are based on the limitations of chemistry, the volatility of emotions, the disappointment of feelings and the entrapment of rules and regulations. This is why too many people get married and get stuck. They are trying very hard to enjoy their marriage based on the dos and don’ts.
As always, marriage is a journey and not a destination. The bible is the blue print while the Holy Spirit is your guide.